What
did you learn from this experience?
"I
need to be more active! My senior mentor put me to
shame in that department!
"I
learned that I do have stereotypes about older people
that need to be broken."
"You
are as old as you decide you are."
How
do you think interacting with senior mentors will
help you grow in knowledge and sensitivity toward
older patients/clients?
"Reinforces
the fact that "older" does not mean "less
of" a person or of a life."
"It
was good to hear first-hand about the seniors' experiences.
I will remember their stories when working in hospital/nursing
home."
"That
age is not something to be afraid of, and there is
full life after 70."
How
do you feel when you talk to the senior mentors?
"Great.
They are true inspirations. If I can achieve even
just half of what they've achieved, my life would
be a success."
"They
revealed that older people are exactly that, just
older people with the same needs as everyone."
Has
interacting with the senior mentors affected your
feelings/attitudes toward older people?
"Absolutely!
I always tended to look at older people as people
who needed to be helped all the time, but that's not
the case. They want to be treated as people who can
do things on their own."
The
seniors also completed an open-ended survey:
How
well do you feel students understand what you are
trying to teach them?
--Most
mentors were impressed with the students' insights
into the aging process.
What
is most important for students to learn about?
-One
mentor counseled that older adults in a hospital are
more than a room number.
-Several
advised that most older adults have strengths, interests,
and are living independently.
--A
few observed that empathy is an essential attribute
in a good nurse.
How
do you feel you have helped the students?
--Students
will take the stories with them as they care for older
adults.
-Students
have been given guidance to age successfully
How
sensitive do you think our students are to the concerns
of older people?
--Mentors
were impressed with the genuine interest the students
brought to the program, their desire to learn gerontological
nursing content, and their knowledge of older adult
demographics.
What
do we need to do to help you teach students better?
-Mentors
advised that the program broaden its recruitment strategy
to include those from diverse socio-economic backgrounds.
PROCESSING
RECORDINGS
Records
of Student interviews
On
Love/Intimacy/Relationships • On
Activity Level • On Meaning
of Life
Advice
for Younger Generation • Nursing
• Student Reflections
On
love/intimacy/relationships:
Student:
Did I hear you say you have a boyfriend now?
Senior:
(laughs) Actually I do. He is a sweet man.
Student:
How did you meet him?
Senior:
We both belong to a group down here in the village.
It's a senior club that I go to. We play bingo, other
games, do other activities there. We met a few months
ago.
Student:
That is just great.
Senior:
He is such a nice man, but just doesn't compare to
my last one. No one could ever take his place.
Student:
Do you mean your husband?
Senior:
Oh, no, I dated a man after my husband passed away.
He was like a second life to me, another breath and
journey. But he passed away about eight years ago.
No one has taken his place since, and nobody will.
Student:
That is too bad. At least you have a nice man now
though. It is always nice to have a companion and
someone to share your time with.
Senior:
Yes, he is a great person to be with. Now you must
have a boyfriend who has swept you off your feet.
Student:
(laughs) Unfortunately, I haven't. But then again,
I don't really have the time for it between work and
school…
And
another:
Student:
Where do you go for emotional support if you need
it?
Senior:
I go to my friends and I have a boyfriend. We have
been together for 2 years.
Student:
How did you meet him?
Senior:
He saw me in church one day and he said he liked me
instantly. When he heard my voice, he said to himself,
"I have to have her." He writes me poetry
and it has been wonderful.
Student:
How does it feel to be attracted to someone at your
age?
Senior:
It feels the same like when I was younger. I still
felt the butterflies in my stomach the first time
I realized I like him and the first time we had sex.
Student:
(silent)
Senior:
Oh, yes we still do even at our age. We enjoy each
other's company. The closeness and intimacy or just
being together are wonderful to have.
Student:
Has getting older affected your sex life?
Senior:
I had a very good experience with all my partners
and the feeling comes back to me. What I mean is I
remember how it was like when I was young. The feeling
comes out especially if you are with someone you care
about and love.
Student:
(silent)
Senior:
I can picture your mind imagining two wrinkled people
doing it (laughs), but I want you to know, the feeling
is there even if you are old.
Student:
That is news to me and it's wonderful to know.
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On
activity level:
Senior:
There are things that I enjoyed doing when I was younger
that are hard for me to do now.
Student:
Can you give me an example?
Senior:
I used to have a lot of parties, preparing things
myself, and just enjoying my friends at home.
Student:
Can't you do it anymore?
Senior:
I still can if I want to, but it is hard for me now
because it's hard to cook, to shop and to clean up
after the party.
Student:
Do you have a lot of friends?
Senior:
Yes, I have church friends. I have my book club friends,
and I have my art club friends.
Student:
Do you meet these friends often?
Senior:
Yes, we all meet in the church almost everyday, but
I meet my book club group once a month in my house.
We have been doing it for the last 19 years.
Student:
That's very impressive to keep the group that long.
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On
the meaning of life:
Student:
Was there a point in your life when you thought to
yourself, "I'm getting old?"
Senior:
There was actually. It happened in my early 60's.
I began to realize I was mirroring my father's aging-high
cholesterol, glaucoma…
Student:
Did that scare you?
Senior:
Yeah it did. I just try to make myself strong on all
sides, my health, my spirituality, my finances, so
I can face anything.
Student:
Do you think your spirituality affects how you feel
about death?
Senior:
Oh sure. I put a lot in my spirituality. Who's that
who said, "if you can't find heaven on earth,
you'll never find it when you leave it?"
Student:
I don't know but I like that.
Senior:
I have an idea of how I want to die. I want to die
in my sleep and the day before I want to do the things
I always do-yoga, see my friends…
Student:
You don't want the journey to ever stop, do you?
Senior:
Exactly…I don't ever want the journey to stop.
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On
advice to the younger generation:
Student:
Something I wonder about is how your generation sees
my generation. Do you think there are huge differences?
Senior:
Well, yes and no. Let me tell you-I could tell you
everything you need to know about life, but you have
to learn it yourself. You know, my parents told me
things like what I should and shouldn't do, and I
didn't listen. But then I learned. You have to learn
for yourself."
Student:
So you think that in general, the younger and the
older generations go through the same type of cycle
over and over again?
Senior:
Yeah, I think that's just life…
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On
nursing:
Student:
What was your last experience with a nurse?
Senior:
I had an operation on my knee a couple of months ago.
It was so wonderful, I'll tell you. See the way it
used to be is that the nurses were older and they
were cold and the doctor knew everything. And you
couldn't ask questions.
Student:
And now?
Senior:
Well, the nurses came in and they were joking with
me. They explained everything. The doctor wanted to
know if I had questions. And they were all young people.
It was great. I didn't think about the stress of my
surgery because I had everyone there.
Student:
That's great. I'm glad to hear you had such a wonderful
experience.
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Students
reflected on their interactions:
"…We
talked throughout our entire luncheon without a moment
of silence. We never had to search for new ideas to
discuss and never even brought out the sheet of questions
that was supplied to us through the senior mentor
program…We exchanged telephone numbers and she
gave me a big hug and kiss on the cheek when she left.
Even though she is 75 and I am 24, I could easily
see us continuing our friendship into the future."
"We
talked about her plans in the future, how she spends
her day, and how she handles her activities of daily
living. We talked about the war in Iraq and how she
feels about death. I learned a lot about aging, like
how it feels to have a chronic disease and to go through
cancer. She does not take life for granted after that."
"I
tried to just ask questions and let her talk. Sometimes
she went on and on and it was hard to keep track of
where we were headed with the conversation. But I
just listened and maintained eye contact during the
conversation. It was funny because after the conversation,
she said, "You look so tired." I felt really
spent. I never thought of a long conversation as being
exhausting."
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